back and forward now…

July 27, 2008

I’m moving to SE Tennessee on August 17th. 

i will miss:
my community. (you know who you are)
family.
comfort.
knowing people everywhere i go. 
slack-lining and climbing with heather.  
the freakin coffee pub. (i don’t even want to think about it!)
watching my nieces grow up.
publix. dangit.
eating/laughing/crying with my roommate.
one fresh. hopkins. momo’s. pitaria.
1st friday.
wireless internet. 

i’m looking forward to:
climbing/hiking/rivers&lakes on the weekends.
bible study with Angie and Gretchen.
having a mama and papa next door.
gardening.
seeing linds and lance more often.
living on a mountain (are you freakin kiddin me!?)
sunrises and sunsets.
buddy jack.
the beanery (it’ll do for TN, coffee pub) 
working with jon and matthew every day.
a simpler, and slower life.
seasons, the changing of colors. (crazy thought) 
learning from pastor bill.
my own little cabin in the mountains. (seriously???) 
hangin’ with babies alea and laurel all the time.
the Mennonite market.  
living close to the cousins. 
the Tellico Plains bakery. mmmmmm.
newness. starting over.  

i’m so exciteeeeeed. it will be bittersweet for sure. but i think i have more to look forward to than i’m leaving behind for now…and i know this is what God has for me. no doubts. it is sure to be an incredible time in my life…

hello new world. here i come!

Advertisements

distraction, please?

July 24, 2008

holy crap. tomorrow is the day. the moment of truth. the phone call tomorrow night. the culmination of the past 3 months of my life…and the determination of the next 9 months…i’m kinda freakin out. 

in other news…bon iver is the best music i’ve heard in a loooong time. wow they are beautiful. thank you jonathan albanese for sharing that album.

countdowns:
find out if i got the job: tomorrow
last day of college classes: 7 days
move out of my house: 8 days
last day of internship: 14 days
graduate with a BSW:  17 days

stream of thought…
i hope i can sleep tonight. babies are a huge responsibility. i haven’t talked to jarrod in forever. i eat entirely too much sugar. i have so much packing to do. this song is amazing. i need help moving. i will miss my faith-filled friend this fall. i really enjoyed building with chase and corey today. i turned in my very last paper as an undergrad tonight. i miss my family. my dishwasher flooded my kitchen tonight. i love the outdoors. i’ve raised $160 for Africa. i’ve really enjoyed spending time with bradley this past week. i’m planning a big party. i hope there’s reason to celebrate… tomorrow is a big day. big big big. i haven’t seen my nieces in entirely too long. i got tan lines last weekend. brit is so beautiful. i need to get back into running. i wish matthew would just call with the news already. i obviously need more patience. tomorrow tomorrow tomorrow. i’m not even promised tomorrow. go to sleep, now. last night, the sunset was beautiful…so i drove to the top of the woodward garage, sat on the ledge, and watched it. tomorrow is dinner with AT and Sarah. then heather is taking care of me so i don’t go crazy till that call from matthew…man o man. just go to bed. it’s gonna be good. whatever it is. it’s gonna be ok…it’s gonna be the best…

*sigh*

a talk with my heavenly Dad alone in the company car monday…
weekly visits with a friend who’s endured cocaine addiction, abandonment, unplanned pregnancy, alcoholism, prostitution, and homelessness…
conversation and tears on hunters’ rooftop.
that hug in your kitchen this spring when you pulled me in close.
dinner, conversation, laughter, sorrow sharing, and new album listening on my couch with heather, bradley & bethany tonight.
waking my niece up to say goodbye last week…listening to her tell me stories and talk about what’s important to a 4-year-old for 15 minutes… 
getting a phone call from zachary as he returned from Niger
answering with “hi friend” and getting back an “I’M ENGAGED!” from sarah last friday. 
witnessing a little girl’s adoption be finalized today.
lunch every day this summer with amanda.
drinking coffee with linds and michael in downtown nashville until the wee hours of the morning.
being asked to be a part of two very special girls’ very special and most important days.
day labor breakfasts and prayer at zack’s
conversation and tears on a living room floor in Dallas with jake and nat in march.
seeing You continually provide in the most minute and massive ways.
getting that message from Lindsay Rae.
every time anyone has asked me not to move out of state…
seeing special names calling on my phone…and that feeling i get.
late-night conversation in my kitchen and mid-day conversation in my living room with aaron, joel, matt, bradley, ric, and karl back in april.
time spent with lnl this summer…
that long talk with Ti on my way home from camp.
endless friendship, encouragement, and authenticity from my roommate and best friend.
real hugs from graham this year finally…
talking, crying, and praying with kelli on her front porch in tuscaloosa.
home sweet homeless in may.
that lake ella walk on my birthday.
my niece’s ballet recital.
saying goodbye to gabe.
singin’ with arthur and linds at the chapel dedication.
the few afternoons spent alone in an open field on a blanket with a book.
experiencing healing this year. over and over again. 

i’m so thankful. Your mercies are new every morning.
listening to bradley’s new songs…and hearing him recite some of his new stuff took me to crazy places tonight. old places of such pain. recent places of tested faith. future places of the retrospect he has experienced… just got me thinkin…
i’m so thankful.

prostitutes and turtles?

July 11, 2008

i need to bleh. so here’s bleh-ing.

.i’m obsessed with kitkats. if you ever need a gift idea. kitkats will do.
.saturday is the ride:well ride in nashville. i’m pumped. i get to see lindsay beth, blocker, arthur, among others. it will be fabulous.
.Turbo is getting huge. like so big. he keeps growing.
.how do you console someone in her place? i am at a loss…and it feels pretty helpless.
.at the moment…i feel like everyone around me is falling apart and it’s quite overwhelming.
.i am so thankful to be in the word daily for 2 weeks straight…what an incredible difference it has made in my days…we will never stop learning about Him…
.I am learning what faith means from an ex-prostitute/alcoholic/cocaine addict. she is my friend. i believe in her. she has more faith than anyone i know. i am so thankful for her. 
.i do not deal well with dramatic people.  i need more patience in that area. 
.i am also so very thankful for amanda this summer. she has been a daily encouragement and confidant.
.i am at a crossroads…the biggest of my life thus far…it is difficult…but beautiful. 
.i cannot get over how things/people/relationships have changed in the last year of my life. it is mind-blowing.
.God keeps putting amazing people in my life…wow.
.i’m on a nickel creek kick right now. they are so beautiful.
.everyone is getting married and having babies. it’s pretty crazy…
.packing needs to start soon. packing!? what!? yes allison…packing. packing is a challenge when you don’t know where you’re going…need furniture? i think i’m giving a lot away…
.these days…i tote babies around town a lot. i make a lot of phone calls. help kids get adopted. i’m in court a lot. i ask adults very uncomfortable questions. and i hang out with recovering addicts. very different from last summer. 
.graduation is in 30 days exactly. holy crap.  
.my supervisor is my hero. she’s a rebel with a cause. young at heart. believes in the unreachable. uses the word “groovy” on a daily basis. and she wears hippie skirts like me. 🙂 
.i really miss camp. 
.i’ve learned so much in the past year.
.i have the most amazing cousins of all time…hands down…end of story.
.i went to golden corral today for the first time since spring break last year…my client’s choice…i did not eat. 
.to answer everyone’s question….no. i do not know where i am living this fall…what i am doing…for how long…or how i am eating.
.i’m trying to have faith. i know i will be fine. he has a plan. he will take care of me to the last detail and second. i need not fear.